It has been a while since I wrote anything. Maybe it was a writer's block or maybe life got me busy and gave me excuses not to write. Or maybe I lost that inspiration, my muse. I binged on series, pre-occupied myself with future consequences and never hold a pen to write poetry or anything inspiring. I only hols them to plan the day and week to accomplish goals. I wrote about writing something, which like every other to do list is taking longer than expected to get checked off.
However, I did jot down few of the ideas and phrases and before I realised it was end of 2018. So much happened this year, I ought to write about it but I lost the track of time.
Before, this year ends, I had to write this, my inability to write to enhance my writing. This blog somehow kept me close to my creation and I shall continue to do so. I will take this rough sketch of a writing and sharpen my almost blunt writing.
How I realise I should start writing and pursue what I just abruptly stopped? Because words came to haunt me in my dream. No seriously. I woke up scared that morning. In my dream, thoughts and words formed so beautifully but I when I tried to write it down on paper or save it on a note of my phone, I just couldn't. I got caught up in the loop and I tried repeatedly to take note but I just couldn't, just like in real life where I got caught up on busy life of adulthood where I couldn't reflect upon the issues or tear my heart out in paper.
I woke up with a tremor. I checked my phone in the hopes I got it on my phone's note probably where I was trying to type my thoughts so desperately. I knew I needed to write but I no longer had way with words not as much as I used to have. I believed it will grow with time but I guess I forgot to water it properly and tend to meet my expectations. I lost myself in the realm of adulting, adjusting to new life that I missed out on doing one thing that I love to do so much, writing. Actually, as a matter of fact I missed out on doing lots of thing that I love to do, for instance dancing, reading books, travelling. I don't knoe when my life changed from reading books into glaring at screen, taking a train, coming home, eating, glaring at screen, lying on bed and then sleeping. And Repeat.
Even the song you love the most becomes boring when it is on repeat. Yet I was doing nothing to get rid of it. Maybe I was enjoying it or maybe I was too tired to do anything about it- mentally and physically. My way to shuffle the reality was to write down my thoughts, reflect upon the day, thus, the answer. I need to start writing again, to clear the mess in my head, to find a perspective. To put down in words what happened in this year that changed me completely as a person. Therefore, more stories coming along and hopefully some poetry.
HAPPY NEW YEAR 2019!!!
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