I don’t know how I am supposed to react to you now. After
this long period of time, I have no idea how I shall I talk to you. I am
confused.
All of a sudden you came out of nowhere and greeted me with
hello. I don’t know at that moment if I should speak or stay silent but yet
some part of me greeted “hello” back to you but I had nothing to say other
than that simple hello. You asked several question to me and I replied in short
with no question from my side. I might have been rude for not even asking, ‘and
you?’ for any of your questions. I couldn't give any proper response to your
all-of-a-sudden phone call with no any reason. I did realize that you also were
having hard time conversing with me after long time. Then why did you call? Why
after this long gap? I no longer remember if I hated you or loved you in the
past, either I still love you or still hate you in the present. I remember
nothing at all. May be I have gone numb
to my feelings or maybe I have forgotten what it feels like to be in love.
Your expectations are like rocket science for me, I am
incapable to understand it, in fact withstand it. I cannot deal with your sky
high wants. I am unable to understand you and your complaints- it strike
towards me like a swords strike right in the middle of the heart. I may never
find a loving guy like you but I also don’t want a guy who doesn't even try to
understand me, trust my feelings.In fact, your feelings, your choices have always been your highest priority. You have
an ability to make me feel special and wanted. But I’m sorry I can’t love you
when you can’t believe me or have trust in me. I tried to ignore your behaviors
that I dislike but I couldn't in fact I began to hate even your good aspects
and before I hated you as a whole, I had to leave before worst.
I’m sorry love.
